If pain could be explained

If pain could be explained I would do it
This pain is big but not enough to kill me
You want me to be happy
Sometimes I think I don´t want it to

*It´s hard to carry with the burden of my life
It´s hard to feel myself underneath your eyes
Wondering what do I mean for you
Would you think am I rag to walk on?
Would you think am I special to suffer?
Because I simpletely don´t worry about
I just don´t worry at all I think*

I know my death is close, maybe ten or twenty years more
Or perhaps it come with a little delay
Sometimes I lay myself down in my bed
And I can´t stop to cry hugging to a pillow

*Chorus

I´m opening my heart up to you
But still I don´t want you to see me crying
I´ve left a life behind who seem to be importantest
Than the life I carry now
Cause many times I found myself dreaming with the past
I don´t care what would happen in the future
Cause all I ever wanted stays behind my back

*Chorus

I have worked miles and miles and they have led me nowhere
I have torn my chest in pieces to reach my heart and make it feel something
I have lost beautiful stars and I don´t wanna lose anymore
Do you understand now when I say I just don´t care
I´m alive only for the ones who love me
But if it were for my own I would rather be dead
And sorry if my words hurt you, but they´re true

*Chorus